As with everything else there are some circumstances that require different responses or actions. Typically I would allow my kids a good deal of freedom, to figure out who they are and what they want out of life, but there has to be boundaries. I’d monitor their computer time and activities so they don’t get ****** into **** or start chatting with someone who is looking to harm kids. I value privacy and wouldn’t want anyone to read my journal. I really can’t see myself snooping through their things or reading their diaries or journals unless there’s a legitimate reason. If I suspect they’ve gotten themselves into some kind of trouble and haven’t come to me about it (rape, sex, drugs, drinking, etc.) I’d **** to do it, but yes I’d probably have to snoop and read. My niece started a journal at our house. Granddad was looking over her shoulder. Mom scooted him away. I told her something like, “If you don’t want anyone reading your journal, keep it somewhere safe and make sure no one’s reading what you’re writing.” Privacy is very important, and it’s emotionally painful when it’s violated.

Privacy was something earned with responsible behavior. If you were living right, you had nothing much worth hiding. Diaries were never looked at because no one could read the handwriting and get past the tear splotches, and spilled cokes.

Kids today do not understand what their legal status is. I don’t even know if the Courts agree on what their status is.

I also grew up knowing all of things I had including clothing belonged in theory to my parents who provided it. I knew that not living up to expectation would cost me in terms of the things that were provided.

There is a disconnect now.
Children have ‘rights’ . WE had parents. We had responsibilities. Teens today seem to think people owe them the life they want.
Kids are scared today, they don’t have the security we had We at least knew where we stood. We might not have liked it but most of us learned to live with in the parameters. We followed rules. We got food, shelter and clothing in return. We worked, we got money. We went to school got good grades we went to college. We got poor grades, we did not go to college. We learned a trade.
Today’s kids do not have security. Mom and Dad might blow in separate directions any time. Bribes work. I will stay in school and out of trouble IF you get me (whatever expensive toy ) I want. I won’t bad mouth to Mom about that girl i saw eating breakfast in your apartment if you pay the insurance on my car for 6 months or a year.
That is not security. I think we need to look at how we are parenting our kids.

I remember my diary when I was a teen. So much of what I put into it was colored by my emotions and dreams at the time and the next day I didn’t feel that way any more. I’m sure if my parents saw it they would have thought I was into a lot of things that I really knew nothing about. I wouldn’t invade my child’s privacy to the extent of reading a diary unless I thought there was something going on that could hurt them and I was looking for clues. The same with going through their stuff.

I would go through my kid’s things in a heartbeat with a fine tooth comb if I suspected involvement in something dangerous or illegal. Their privacy wouldn’t be nearly as important to me as their safety.

Reading diaries
WTH?

That’s OTT!